Pre Nervous Gender: Vociferous Mikeee & Odious Jerry

The Snappers

         

THE SNAPPERS - THE DISINTEGRATION OF A BAND

At the L.A.C.E. gallery Halloween party 1978, the guests witnessed "an evening of random acts of violence" a performance appropriately titled by its Executors, The Snappers.

The concert began with general signs of confusion within the band. The drummer, who needed No electricity, mouthed incomprehensible screams as the rest or the band fiddled with their cords for Power. The music started, drums lagging a fraction of a beat behind. Then an unidentified person mercifully pulled the cord which supplied all the electricity. More ugly faces end screams were exchanged across the brick stage.

When the power returned, the band began once more, this time in beat. However before the first song was over, the microphone went dead. Vociferous Mikee, the lead singer, continued to sing in spite of the technical difficulty. The second song dragged on and on without vocals; the electric bass setting on the synthesizer gradually turned to noise. At this point the frustration, or alcohol consumed by the band, flooded their heads. Odious jerry, synthesizer person, left the stage. Guitarist Robert kicked a bole in one of his speakers. Drummer Jessie toppled over his drums. The Host, Gronk, did not suspect the Snappers had encountered difficulties since the band Airway had made Similar noises earlier.

When Mikeee was asked for his opinion about the concert be said:

"Well, it was ok I guess, I'm kind of disappointed that we didn't get to do our ethnic stuff like "we got the atomic taco" and "what do you do you do when a cock roach passes by". I had about five hand fulls of roaches to throw at the audience for that. It took us nearly Twenty five minutes to catch them. I still suspect internal sabotage, the mike was snipped in two places".

When jerry was asked about the internal sabotage theory he answered:

"Yeah, I was really pissed at Jessie for changing our name from Snappers to young Nazis at the last moment. But I'm liberal, I can understand it, after all he was drunk. Besides be has this superiority complex because he thinks he's straight."

When Robert was asked about the superiority complex theory he said nothing.

When Jessie was approached he mouthed some incomprehensible screams and walked off.

Jerry said: "See, he's been acting like that ever since Mikeee beat him up. That's why he threw Mikeee out of the band."

Mikeee added:

"Yeah, look at him, he's trying to pick up Michelle over there, but he's too ugly. It would help if he had a personality".

"Or at least shaved once a month" said jerry.

Robert said nothing.

When asked about their future plans jerry said: "I'm quitting. Jessie wants this sixteen year old queer for a singer, his braces clash terribly with the microphone. Jessie bas a fixation for faggots."

Mikeee said: "We're de-integrating. Jerry and I are getting rid of the heterosexuals and going off on our own. We want to be a homogeneous band.

Those are terrible puns: said jerry. Robert said nothing.

The L.A.C.E. gallery concert was only the second for the snappers, and because of their internal conflicts, it was also their last.

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